Monthly Archives: September 2018

What's Your Story?

WHAT’S YOUR STORY? THE RED BELT by Charlie Raskin

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THE RED BELT

An Experience in the Life of a Salesman

By Charlie Raskin

“The rain in Spain, mainly from the plain” couldn’t even touch it.  The fury of that downpour drenched every inch of me.  Right down to the bone.  No wonder my wife Kathy looked worried as I entered my home in Wayland, back in April 1970.  The loving emotion on her face was comforting.  But I never got the hug and kisses I so needed at that moment.  All of her worry and love was washed away five seconds later when she told me that the Boston Police Department was very much in need of my presence.

“My name is Detective Murphy,” the officer said.  “I’m heading a murder investigation here in the city of Boston.  We found a red belt, manufactured by a firm called ‘Paris’ and was informed by Filene’s Department Store that you were the salesman for this company.  We’d appreciate some information concerning this piece of evidence.”

At this point, I excused myself and reached for the telephone to call my wife.  Detective Murphy immediately obstructed my motion and informed me that a call to the suburbs cost money.  I used my A.T.&T. credit card to let Kathy know that all was well.

The credit card led to another call—this time, to my Chicago office.  The belt was small (30-32”), and it was red.   A cotton fabric comprised the body of the belt, and it was attached at each end with very soft, supple leather.  One part of the leather was attached to a buckle with a hook that slipped easily into any one of the three holes in the leather on the other end.  The soft leather showed a deep crease behind the first hole and a very slight crease in the third.  The middle hole showed no wear.  The few numbers stamped on the belt showed that it had been delivered to a military PX in Hawaii.

I asked the detective if they had made any assumptions about whether either the victim or the assailant was gay.  A crescendo of voices in the room responded with the same question:  “How did you know?”

In the 70s, as a salesman, I had come to recognize that a number of gay men who were out of the closet wore clothing in the high color range.  And, in my estimation, a good many of them knew how to coordinate colors.

It turned out that the victim was a well-known gay man in the antique business.  He had been left, nude, on the floor of his apartment.  The only item that didn’t belong in the apartment was the red belt found near him.  It was much too small for the victim.

I was asked for more impressions.

Well, I told them, the well-worn creases in the leather showed that the owner had lost a great deal of weight.  That and the evidence that it had been purchased at a PX led to my thinking that the owner had been in the U.S. Navy.

The detective told me that the department had a huge supply of other clothing stored in a cell in the basement of the building and asked me to look it over to see if I could make suggestions about their original wearers.  I came back the next day and took a look, offering a comment here and there, but nothing that I thought provided the detective bureau with any inspiration.

About a month later, I was called by the department to thank me for the investigative road I had suggested to them.  It led to the conviction of three young servicemen stationed in East Boston.  And my comments about the other clothing actually produced detective action on other cases.

It occurred to me that, in addition to holding up the weight of the world, the belts and suspenders and ties that I sold added a lot of high color to our daily lives.

BOLLI Member Charlie Raskin

Since this is the first piece I’ve ever written for any publication, it might be my last.  Inspiration to write came from Liz David, who happens to have an inside track to aging.  Also, thought it might be another road to “Conviviality.”

Hope others will take a stab at writing too!

WHAT'S ON YOUR MIND?

WHO CARES ABOUT THE ADA?

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WHO CARES ABOUT THE ADA?

By Cindy Wentz

Who cares about the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA)?  I do, and you should as well.  OK, OK–perhaps it’s not as pressing as flipping the House or whether Kavanaugh gets confirmed… or is it?  I maintain that it touches many more aspects of our daily lives than many events of the day.  Moreover, it is influenced by all three branches of our government.

Did you know that 20% of Americans have some type of disability?  I have seen a figure as high as 35% for seniors.  Under the ADA, the term ‘disability’ refers to a physical or mental impairment that significantly limits one or more major life activities regardless of whether said impairment is current, is part of the individual’s history or record, or is a perception by others.  Hence the disability may (use of a walker, blindness) ) or may not (mental illness, hearing loss) be visible to the casual observer.  Do YOU have a disability?  What about your family members?  What about your fellow BOLLI learners?  It has been said that disability is the only minority group to which one can gain membership at any time.  So, if you don’t have a disability now. . . just wait. . . or maybe not.

The ADA is a fairly straightforward civil rights act for people who just happen to have disabilities.  It was signed into law in 1990 by then President George H. W. Bush.  I will defer to Josh Mendelsohn, our October 9” Lunch & Learn” speaker, to provide more specifics.  Josh, an attorney, has worked for the Department of Justice Civil Rights Division and currently heads up the Community Living Division at the Massachusetts Rehabilitation Commission.  Josh happens to be Deaf.

Instead, I will attempt to convey what the ADA means in my life.  As some of you know, I have very poor vision.  I can’t read print, can’t see traffic lights, don’t understand those scenes in movies that lack dialog, and encounter challenges in a hundred other commonplace activities.  Under the advent of the ADA, the subsequent Telecommunications Act of 1996, and Section 508 of the Rehabilitation Act (amendments 1998), I can now expect to be able to use the ATM at my local bank branch by plugging in a headphone and having the information on the screen read to me.  I can hope that those traffic lights have audible signals indicating when the light has turned green.  Increasingly, I can access audio description for current films and, sometimes, even for theatre productions.  BOLLI will make any class handouts available to me in an electronic format so that I can read them using VoiceOver.  Most course readings can be downloaded to be read in large print or listened to in human or synthesized speech.  Most importantly, the ADA has contributed significantly to changing my perceptions.  No longer do I regard these fairly simple accommodations with gratitude as I rather apologetically request them.  No!  I have a right to them.  It’s the law, and I utilize them with dignity and pride.

What about you?  Do you or a fellow BOLLI student encounter any difficulty in hearing he SGL, in maneuvering your walker or wheelchair around the BOLLI space, in seeing/hearing those audiovisual presentations?  Do you have any other need caused by a disability?  If so, speak up!  Your tuition payment is as good as the next person’s and you need not shortchange yourself.  I assure you that Avi, Megan, and Lily are ready to assist as am I (BOLLI’s Inclusion and Disability Liaison).  And do come to “Lunch & Learn” on October 9 for a more in-depth look at the ADA.

BOLLI member and Advisory Council Inclusion & Diversity Liaison Cindy Wentz

Cindy’s  passion for and  her commitment to disability rights and independent living led to a 40 year career in rehabilitation.  Though happily retired,  she has found  gigs that allow her to continue to contribute to her professional interests.  In addition to BOLLI, Cindy enjoys traveling, hiking in the fall,  attending local theatre productions, and countless other pursuits–some of which she hasn’t even yet discovered.

BOLLI News, BOLLI Special Interest Groups, Make a Difference

FOCUS ON SPECIAL INTEREST GROUPS: MAKE A DIFFERENCE

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Aside from courses, lectures, seminars, and other activity, at BOLLI, we have an extensive menu of  Special Interest Groups that give us even more opportunities to get to know each other and dive more deeply into engaging pursuits.  Each month, we will focus on another BOLLI SIG and its activities–membership is always open!

In August, our BOLLI “Make a Difference” SIG was featured in the National Osher Newsletter.  That article is reprinted here.

OLLI at Brandeis University 

Make a Difference

Leaders Eleanor Jaffe and Elaine Dohan

“Make a Difference” is an affinity group that evolved naturally at the Osher Lifelong Learning Institute at Brandeis University. It is led by two long-term members, Elaine Dohan and Eleanor Jaffe who have been participating for many years with classmates in discussion groups as well as in history and current event classes.  For example, Eleanor taught a course called “Resistance and Resilience in Politics and Life” in which current issues, as well as law and history, were discussed. In addition, every semester,  OLLI at Brandeis  hosts a variety of speakers who stimulate discourse from their unique positions.

Inviting colleagues to join with Elaine and Eleanor to form a group for civic action seemed an obvious next step.  As seniors, their particular experience and perspective gives them a unique vantage point from which to view today’s political climate and current events.  They also believe they have a responsibility to their grandchildren to set an example of the importance of citizen participation in civic discourse and action, both through voting and by speaking out.

Currently, the group is focusing their attention on issues concerning children. These include topics such as immigration, school shootings, voter registration and juvenile justice.  They meet regularly and reach consensus on current critical issues. Actions include writing postcards and calling editors of newspapers, members of Congress, and executives of corporations to urge action on behalf of these important issues.  They then follow up and write “thank you notes” to those individuals and groups who are providing positive leadership in these areas.

BOLLI’s “Make a Difference” SIG meets every other Friday morning from 10:30 to 12:00.  Watch the Bulletin for announcements of meetings and activities.

All of our SIGs are member-driven.  Don’t see your particular interest on our list?  Talk to a staff member about starting a new one!

BOLL Matters Co-editor Sue Wurster

Want to see your group highlighted here? Send updates on your SIG activities for future focus.  susanlwurster@gmail.com

 

 

 

BOLLI Special Interest Groups, Make a Difference, Volunteering Matters

WHAT’S ON YOUR MIND? RUTH BRAMSON ON “MAKING THE TIME”

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MAKE THE TIME TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE

By Ruth N. Bramson
“Service is the rent we pay for living.  It is the very purpose of life and not something you do in your spare time.”  So says civil rights activist Marian Wright Edelman.  And that message has never been more important than it is right now.

There is no doubt that we are all busy with families, friends, and, of course, our studies at BOLLI.  During these troubled times, we tend to look more inward and wonder what lies ahead for our children, grandchildren, and our country.  But in the midst of this chaos, the need for creative, energetic, and skilled volunteers in our nonprofit community is more immediate than ever.

Too often, we underestimate the power of sharing our time.  And yet, that investment of ourselves has the potential to turn a life around or even change the direction of the world we live in–close to home or far away.   We only have to read the papers or listen to the news reports to recognize and understand the needs of people, whether from natural disaster, armed conflict, or thoughtless and cruel political action.

Non-profits depend heavily on volunteers to help them serve their clients, sustain their missions, and raise funds for their programs and services. Because the current turmoil has increased the need for these services tenfold, volunteers may, in fact, be the key to survival for many community-based organizations.  Even larger brand-name non-profits like the Red Cross need the muscle and passion of volunteers to sustain their missions.  And we need only to look at the recent disasters caused by hurricanes, fires, and flooding to see the urgency.

Volunteering is the ultimate exercise in democracy.  We vote in elections, but when we volunteer, we vote every day about the kind of communities we want to live in.  Help address climate change, teach a child to read, keep a teenager in school, or support a domestic violence victim–the needs are as wide as our minds and our energies can embrace.  The personal pride and satisfaction that are derived from these activities are incalculable and are recognized as a true measure of character and values.

No monetary value can equate to the value of a dedicated volunteer.  You are an extension of professional staff who are engaged in the fulfillment of the organization’s mission.  Your time and accomplishments must and will be recognized and applauded.

As Dr. Seuss so wisely said, “Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, things aren’t going to get better–they simply are NOT.”

BOLLI member Ruth Bramson

Retired CEO of the Girl Scouts of Eastern MA, Ruth held prior executive positions at TJMaxx and Reebok and served as Undersecretary of Administration and Finance in the Romney Administration.  Ruth earned her B.A. at Columbia and her M.A. from B.U.   She lives in Boston with her husband.  They have  5 children and 9 grandchildren. 

 

Memoir Writing

MEMOIR WRITING: MY FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS

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MY FRIDAY NIGHT LIGHTS

by Steve Goldfinger

My parents were aghast when I strode home from school wearing a large, gold helmet, bowl-sized shoulder pads, and a huge purple shirt bearing the number 34.  It hanged to my shins.   At nine years old in Brownwood, Texas (population 12,000 or so), I was on Miss Wilson’s football team.

My dad was a doctor in the 13th Armored tank division, training here to join General Patton’s final push. We had come from Brooklyn to be with him. Miss Wilson was the principal of the grade school. She was also spelling teacher, math teacher, librarian, baseball and football coach.

I was in the 3rd grade when I arrived. After appearing in a class and answering a few simple questions about Africa, the topic of the week, I was promoted to the 4th.  In short order, the 5th. And a few days later, the 6th.  Was I really that bright?

Anyway, in the 6th grade, the guys automatically became Miss Wilson’s football team. Me included, shrimp that I was, who knew nothing about football. When I was playing line during practice scrimmages, I couldn’t understand why the kid across from me sometimes took a running jump over me when the ball was snapped and, at other times, just stood there looking down. I dIdn’t even know the difference between offense and defense.

I made it into one play during the season. It was a game played under the lights on a Friday night–yes, in 1944, this was a Texas tradition even for grade schools–and my dad brought a few of his fellow officers to join him in the stands. We were losing 35 to 0 and had the ball when Miss Wilson pushed me onto the field. “Tell them to pass, pass, and keep passing.”  It took me a while to get out there. I repeated her words to our quarterback in a tremulous voice and got up to the line. I don’t remember what happened immediately after, but my father told me I appeared exceedingly brave after receiving smelling salts on the sidelines.

That was my football career.

When the baseball season came around, I was first up in the batting order–a cinch to draw a walk because of my measly size, even without crouching.  And walk I did at the begining of our first game. The next pitch was thrown for a ball as I stood there when, all of a sudden, there was Miss Wilson charging at me.

“Why didn’t you steal?” she shouted.

“What do you mean?”

“You gotta steal on the first pitch!”

Really? I didn’t know that, but, on the next one, I followed her command. The ball beat me to the bag by about ten steps.  The shortstop held it out at me, waist high, and I slid right under it into the base….safe!

There she was, charging again.

“What was that?!”

They had never heard of a slide inTexas!  So this pipsqueak from the north had something to teach them.

When we returned to Brooklyn, it took a fair amount of persuasion by my mother to convince the principal of P.S. 234 to allow me to move ahead.  He wanted to discount my Texas education altogether and send me back to the third grade where I belonged.

Memoir Writer Steve Goldfinger

Since joining BOLLI two years ago, after a long career in medicine, Steve has been exploring his artistic side.  He has been active in both the Writers Guild and CAST (Creativity in Acting, Storytelling, and Theatre) as well as the Book Group.  

"The Book Nook"

SEPTEMBER BOOK NOOK: DO YOU LIKE KIPLING?

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Dennis writes about a book that made a profound impact upon him when he was young.  What books hit you that way?  Send your own “Kiplings” to us for sharing in upcoming “Book Nook” features.  

KIPLING: PATRON SAINT OF OUTSIDERS AND MISFITS
Portrait  of Rudyard Kipling by John Collier, ca 1891

By Dennis Greene

An anonymous joke about Kipling goes like this:

He: Do you like Kipling?

She: I don’t know, I have never kippled.

*

Not the greatest joke, but I would have answered differently. I do like Kipling, and I will explain why–but first, you need to know a little about me.

At seven years old, I was uprooted from my comfortable neighborhood in Queens and replanted in a rundown section of New Bedford, Massachusetts. As the smallest, youngest kid in the third grade at Harrington School, and the only Jewish kid in this multi-ethnic, very brown-skinned school, I felt unwelcome and ignored.  When my mom tried to nudge me toward the kids in the nearby Jewish community, I found no welcome there either.  I was the strange kid from the “bad” neighborhood who didn’t know how to fit in.  After a series of painful attempts to become part of this community, I ceased trying.  I turned to books, movies, and TV for company.

This is where Sir Rudyard Kipling comes in. I don’t know who first suggested I read The Jungle Book, but my well-worn 1955 Book-of the Month Club “bonus edition” still occupies a place of honor on my bookshelf.  Mowgli, the little lost Indian boy, is unlike any other creature in the Seonee Hills. At the beginning of the tale, he is a complete outsider, but with the help of Baloo, the wise old bear, and Bagheera, the formidable black panther, he becomes a member of the wolf pack and, over time, becomes accepted and admired by all the jungle inhabitants.  Bagheera, Mowgli’s fierce mentor and protector, had also begun his life as a stranger in the Seonee Hills.

As a fellow outsider, I felt a strong kinship with Mowgli. Soon after reading The Jungle Book. I saw the movie version of Kipling’s Kim, in which an orphan British child in India, who initially is a misfit in his school and an alien among the native population, is able, with the encouragement of a British soldier and spy (played by Errol Flynn) to become “a friend to all the world.”

Based on these two works, I would designate Kipling as the patron saint of “outsiders and misfits.” Rudyard Kipling’s ability to portray the outsider was due to both his extraordinary talent as a writer and his own experience. He was an outsider, first as a British boy born and living in India, and then as an Indian-born young man in a brutal English boarding school.

Inspired by these stories, I went on to discover other literary role models, like Tarzan of the Apes, and John Carter of Mars, both of whom entered their strange worlds naked, different, and alone but eventually earned honored places in their adopted homes.

It took me eight years to shed my outsider status and, like Mowgli, become accepted by  a “pack” aquiring friends among many different and diverse groups.  I have never again felt as lonely and disconnected as I did during those early years in New Bedford, but as film director and producer Tim Burton observed, “If you’ve ever had that feeling of loneliness, of being an outsider, it never quite leaves you.”

“BOLLI Matters” feature writer Dennis Greene

Dennis spent five years as an engineer and then forty as a lawyer–and sixty as a pop culture geek and junkie.  He saw “The Day the Earth Stood Still” in 1951 when he was seven and has been hooked on speculative fiction ever since.

SEND YOUR “KIPLINGS” TO  susanlwurster@gmail.com

 

 

 

Memoir Writing

MEMOIR WRITING: DINNER DATING

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The Writers’ Guild prompt was:  “A Memorable Dinner Date,” which I chose to approach in a somewhat different way.

by Sue Wurster

For some, uranium dating marks time.  For others, it’s tree rings.  For us, it was dinner.  Not long after we started dating, Kathy chose to prepare our first home-cooked meal in my ridiculously tiny New York City efficiency apartment.

“So, where are your spices?” she asked me, turning from what constituted the kitchen (a grown-up version of the kid unit) to the den (the desk right behind her).

“Up there on the left above the sink,” I pointed.  Where else would they be?  I thought.  I’ve got all of three cupboards.

“I see salt, pepper, and a jar of Lawry’s,” she returned, “—but no spices.”

From that moment, the cultivation of my Midwestern palate was underway.

Two years later, we took it as tacit endorsement of our relationship when Kathy’s mom Betty added a bowl of sage stuffing to her Thanksgiving fare. (And I thought I’d been subtle about not having developed a taste for her renowned oyster variety.)  Kathy’s grandmother Caroline and the New Orleans family retainer Ella had passed their gourmet secrets to Betty who, in turn, gave them to her daughter.  Ten years later, after Betty died, Kathy placed her mom’s large, red recipe box on a shelf in our pantry and made her famous brisket and kugel for dinner.

Now, Kathy never actually used recipes, her own or anybody else’s.  I, however, follow them religiously, and what I cook ends up coming out just fine.  Kathy, though, could read a recipe, toss it aside, and do her own thing—always resulting in something … extra fine.

After Kathy died, I thought I’d try to carry on some of their best traditions myself—not Betty’s oyster stuffing, of course, but her brisket and kugel, for sure.  I went to that red box in the pantry and discovered that it contained no recipes at all.  On card after card, Betty described her dishes and made notes—hints, reminders, directives.  I could actually hear her voice:  If you forgot to get shallots, add a little garlic.

The one ingredient our spice rack eventually lacked when it came to home-cooked dinners was time.  Not t-h-y-m-e time but, rather, the minutes and hours that gourmet cooking entails.  As teacher parents with papers to grade and picky eaters to feed, we ended up resorting to the quick and easy.  My gastronome’s array of gourmet cooking paraphernalia gathered dust in the pantry.  There never seemed to be enough grown-up time for the espresso machine.  Panini press.  Crepe maker.  Sushi shaping tubes.  Or the bread machine.  All ended up waiting, as were we, for our picky eaters to develop their more sophisticated palates.

It’s been almost seven years now.  About two years ago,  Cara pulled out the fancy steamer for her experimental veggie concoctions.  And a few months later, after a shopping jaunt in Natick that somehow ended up with her buying yeast, of all things, Dani commandeered the bread machine.  Both have dipped into that recipe box to create their own versions of both Grandma Betty and Mommy’s perennial favorites.

From that first dinner in my city shoebox to the last dish of Thanksgiving oyster stuffing, what Kathy gave all of us–every day, in every way–was the very best in true “soul food.”  Complete with spices.

“BOLL Matters” editor Sue Wurster

This blog has been such a highlight for me at BOLLI, and I hope to see more members choose to write and share thoughts, favorite books/movies/tv shows, local recommendations for restaurants and/or other establishments, memories–or take your camera for a walk and send us the results!

 

Send submissions to:  susanlwurster@gmail.com

BOLLI Photo Group, BOLLI Special Interest Groups

A VERY SPECIAL INTEREST GROUP: THE BPG

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A VERY SPECIAL INTEREST GROUP:  THE BPG

BOLLI Photographers “In the Wild” (photo by Dennis Greene)

By Lydia Bogar and Joanne Fortunato

Be sure to check out the BPG–BOLLI Photography Group!  Some members may be true camera buffs since getting their first Brownie camera in fifth grade, but many are novices, having just taken-up photography in retirement years.  The eye takes in something beautiful, unusual, colorful (or all three) that makes impact and becomes an integral part of the day.  Inspiration comes from anyone, anywhere, or anything around us–from a complex flower or a simple weed; a day at Fenway or a walk in the backyard after a rain storm.

“This summer, we began a weekly photo challenge, giving the group a new topic to photograph each week,” says BPG organizer Joanne Fortunato.   Topics included an animal, a reflection, something red, happiness, or other subjects suggested by members of the group.  Joanne says that the purpose of the challenge was to encourage members to exercise their own creativity and to photograph something new and different every week.

The BPG has also taken field trips to points within an ever-expanding circle of our local communities:  Tower Hill Botanical Gardens, Mount Auburn Cemetery, and Copley Square.  One of the group’s next trips will be to ‘Fog x FLO’ along the Emerald Necklace!

Recently, the BPG met to discuss final preparations for their new exhibit, which will be available for viewing in the classrooms as the fall semester starts.  The entire BOLLI community will be able to savor the group’s latest works.   Perhaps viewers may even be inspired to join the group and discover their own creative eyes.

Watch the BOLLI Bulletin for announcements of BPG meetings, challenges, and trips.  You don’t need a fancy camera–just a desire to see your world through a different lens.

“BOLLI Matters” co-editor, feature writer, and photography enthusiast Lydia Bogar
BPG Organizer Joanne Fortunato

 

TECH TALK

SEPTEMBER TECH TALK: Saving Money on Gas

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SAVING MONEY ON GAS

by John Rudy

Gas is expensive, and it is easy to locate at least two stations near your house where the price difference is as much as $0.25 per gallon.  Of course, the least expensive one may not be so a month later.  What to do?  Examine www.gasbuddy.com

A 20 cent/gal difference (for regular) is about $3 for a fill-up which might result in $100 over the year.  And this is just as useful on a trip where you might think about pulling off (and away from) the highway.  The map below is for places near my house.  See the huge variation.

BOLLI Matters “Tech Talk” feature writer John Rudy

A long-time technology expert and guide, John provides his helpful hints in this monthly BOLLI Matters feature.  In the comment box below, provide John with questions,  comments, or suggestions future tech items to cover.