ON THE LIGHTER SIDE WITH LARRY: JUST DESSERTS

Here,  Larry responds to the Writers Guild prompt, “Just Desserts,” in his own wry way.

JUST DESSERTS

by Larry Schwirian

          Alfredo and Ambrosia Bacon were a fiftyish couple who fancied themselves food and wine aficionados. They lived in a high-rise condo in an upscale neighborhood in the heart of the city and frequently partied with friends and acquaintances. These gatherings were often an opportunity for all those gathered to share their recent happenings and boast a little about their latest exploits and discoveries.  Exaggeration was typically the name of the game, but the Bacons were particularly noted for their hyperbole.

At one such get together, Alfredo was bragging about a dinner that he and Ambrosia had recently enjoyed in a new Japanese restaurant, Shogun, in another part of the city. He described in great detail just how delightfully the food was presented and how the aroma of the Kobe beef delicately tantalized his sense of smell and caused him to drool with intense anticipation. He swore that, after the meal, his taste buds were in such a state of existential bliss that he couldn’t conceive of having dessert even though it was included in the cost of this repast. Likewise, Ambrosia went into excruciating detail about her choice: Secret Garden Maki with salmon tempura and a cream cheese center with avocado…and so on, and so on, and so on… she, too, rejected the idea of having dessert. They both waxed longingly about how well the Sake went with the meal and then bored everyone to tears about what a great bargain it was; less than four-hundred-fifty dollars for a complete meal with wine, not including tax and tip. Alfredo raved that a meal of Kobe beef alone typically costs in excess of three-hundred fifty.

Needless to say, the rest of those gathered were somewhat skeptical of the Bacons’ accounting of this bodacious dinner but particularly about its being such a great deal. Trying to be polite, one of the women asked Alfredo about what other delicacies had been included. The men seemed to be quite interested in the list of desserts and asked Ambrosia how she could possibly have skipped hers. As the guests headed home, there was considerable banter about the tale, particularly about its cost.

Shortly after the gathering, the Sunday newspaper featured a review in the Arts and Leisure Section about the recently opened Shogun Restaurant. The food critic was fairly complimentary about the quality of the food but very skeptical about whether the Kobe steak was really what it was purported to be; very few Japanese restaurants in the United States actually import Kobe beef as it is exceedingly expensive. As, at this particular restaurant, the Kobe beef was priced at less than three hundred dollars, he doubted the claim that this item was genuine. The writer was also of the opinion that although the food was decent, it was terribly over-priced. To those who attended the gathering and read the article, it seemed to them that Alfredo and Ambrosia may well have skipped their after meal sweets but did in fact finally get their…Just Desserts.

Frequent “BOLLI Matters” contributor and co-leader of the Writers Guild Larry Schwirian

Architect Larry and his fellow architect wife Caroline live in an historic preservation home in Newton and, together, lead BOLLI courses on architecture.  Larry has been an active participant in  and leader of the Writers Guild special interest group as well as serving on the BOLLI Journal staff.  

2 thoughts on “ON THE LIGHTER SIDE WITH LARRY: JUST DESSERTS”

  1. I like this “shaggy dog story”. It brings to mind “if the foo shits, wear it”, people who live in grass houses shouldn’t stow thrones”, and “it’s the furry with the syringe on top”

Leave a Reply to Loissockol Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *